Marinating Your Life

When following a recipe, it is sometimes important that you marinate your meat with certain ingredients to enhance the flavor and bring out the goodness. Along with the main course, it is important to add just the right sides that provide just the right contrast but complements the meal. However, sometimes you can improvise ingredients and leave certain things out or add extra things along the way. Sometimes we forget that our lives are quite similar to a recipe. Our lives would not be as fulfilling without all the extra spice and garnishes. Sometimes our lives might feel like a five-course meal, while other times we might feel as if we're simply going through the drive-thru window for a greasy burger. We're given appetizers of something we might like, only to see that it takes more work than we might have hoped for. We like to satisfy our sweet tooth by getting a slice of happiness.

We fall into a comfort zone which is quite similar to different comfort foods that provide immediate satisfaction, but we might like to get out of the rut to cook a meal that is a little more snazzy. Do you feel that your life has enough ingredients in it, that you are ready to be cooked and served? Or are there things missing that still need to be added? Or is the secret ingredient never quite finished. Meeting new people, traveling new places, and studying new subjects all contributes to us understanding the world better and understanding ourselves better. It is difficult to feel at peace in your own skin sometimes, but with the right combinations...our life can be blended in a blender to create a beautiful experience that is all our own. Be sure that there is enough room on your plate of life to include all the amazing side items, and share your main course of life with others. Let others in to soak up the flavor. In the end, we owe it to ourselves to enhance the flavor in our daily lives...not just in our food.

When life gets stressful or you feel too many people are bringing you down, use the strainer to drain some of the negativity out. Remember, your recipe is all your own. What tastes good to others does not necessarily taste good to you. Don't be afraid to create your own unconventional meal...create a meal and a life that suits your taste. Time to preheat our ovens. No need to set a timer, because your life experiences might happen at all different times. Make your recipe a great one, make it one to pass down to later generations so they can smile and laugh at some of your steps that you took along the way. Next time a recipe says to "marinate something"...don't forget that you are busy marinating your own life as well.

New Year Equals New Blog.

I've always been the type to set a resolution on any day of the year...it definitely doesn't have to be the first of the year in order to have a goal or make a promise to yourself. However, it is fun for people to have a fresh start and a new perspective as we get out our new calendars and think about what things the new year might have to offer. When sizing up a year that has gone by, it's easy to focus on the positive things and the negative things...but the truth is that every year might have its ups and downs. The power and beauty of a new year means moving forward and carrying the things you have learned from previous years with you so that you'll be armed and ready. Stay strong and stay true to yourself and others. Each year I think I am going to "floss more"...so please hold me to that and remind me, haha. The biggest part of all my years has always been family, friends, and pets...and for the past few years I've had my loving husband to share an incredible life with. Hoping for many, many more years with him. No one can ever take away your memories...And there are so many new memories and adventures to make. Don't waste a perfectly good year by getting in a rut or repeating the same year that you just had...make a vow to get even closer to the people that you love. Set a goal to take care of yourself as well as the ones around you that need you and count on you. Give a part of yourself to a good cause that helps you reflect on just how fortunate you really are. I know that things are more easily said than done, but this year and every year, we can make our words our reality. We have many blessings to be thankful for...and a new year is one of them.

Coping with Things Beyond Your Control.

When life throws a curve ball or the unexpected happens, it is important to stick together to carry one another to the other side. Life is far from easy and far from being fair. Never lose hope...and never lose each other. Sometimes things happen which can bring people closer together. Sometimes it takes all we have to fight, persevere, and gradually move forward one day at a time. Find comfort in a friend, reveal a part of yourself to a loved one which leaves you feeling vulnerable but more open than ever before. When we're too hard on ourselves, we eventually break down.

What gives you comfort? Is it the smile on someone's face...is it the warm embrace of a hug...is it quiet time with your own thoughts or pillow. It is hard to accept things for what they are sometimes, but in the end we can do our best to grow from each experience and try not to blame ourselves. We can find peace and we don't always have to understand everything. Obstacles and challenges seem like they are in our way all the time. Give thanks for the times that are smooth sailing, for those times can give you the courage and strength to keep going. We never know exactly what anyone else is going through, so it is always important to be patient, be kind, be gentle with people's hearts and minds.

Defining Moments.

It's funny how some things you don't forget and some feelings you can hold onto no matter how significant or insignificant. If you let something impact your life enough, then it might help define how you see yourself. I still remember the day in Fourth Grade that I won Third Place in the Spelling Bee. I really did not think anything about being in the spelling bee, I did not study the words and I had not really given it much thought. I got up there to spell each word and before I knew it, I had made it to the bottom three. My teacher was very proud of me and I was also the only Fourth Grader to win. First and Second Place went to a Fifth Grader and a Sixth Grader. Our picture was taken for the yearbook and I received a HUGE trophy. I did not really know what to do, I was more on the shy side in Fourth Grade, although I talked to my friends and family plenty...I did not know how to go about carrying a huge trophy back with me to my classroom. I guess most kids would have bragged about it to the class or shown it off, but I think I just put it in my locker not wanting to cause a scene, then later putting it in my backpack or holding it in my lap on the bus ride home. But as soon as I got home with that trophy, I showed it off to my brother of course! He seemed impressed. My parents were really happy for me, and displayed my trophy on the mantel in the living room. The truth is I have always loved spelling. I always visualize words in my head and people often ask me how to spell things. It is fun to think back about taking that big trophy home with me and I still remember overhearing my fourth-grade teacher bragging to the fifth and sixth grade teachers how her young fourth grader placed Third. :)

YOLO.

The new slang word YOLO means "You only live once..." And while I am all for living each day to its fullest and making the best of your life, I can't help but wonder if people are using this term the wrong way. Youth are impressionable and pay attention to the media and are always looking for the new "it" thing to do or say. While I don't exactly hang out with today's youth, I do come in contact with youth & try to keep up on the trends or keep an eye out for what is really going on in high schools, peer groups, and so forth... Is saying "YOLO" a way to use peer pressure? If one teen offers another teen a cigarette, drugs, or alcohol and says "YOLO: You Only Live Once"...does it mean to forget all the rules and whether things are good or bad...and just do it because you think everyone else is or you think it is the cool thing to do. People do enjoy doing crazy or stupid things from time to time...but since we only live once, shouldn't we still be cautious and careful with the ONE life we have? I don't mean overly cautious and careful about every little thing. And it is not my job to dictate how people use their slang, but it takes a while for some people to gain the wisdom to make good choices. With today's youth, we see kids getting into things way more rapidly and thinking that there are not consequences to their actions. But they are not invincible...and sometimes the things we do today, we pay for tomorrow. Stay strong enough to say "no" and live your life according to your own goals and your own preferences. Don't do something just to impress the whims of others...anyone will use you or test just how far you are willing to go. Instead go the distance for yourself and in the end you will be thankful.

Life can be what you make it.

Quote: "I have many lives to live, and I have already spent too much time on this one."

This quote has stuck with me since I heard the exact context in college English Class when we were studying specific poets, authors. At that moment in college, I could relate to this quote because I believed in it and could see myself living a few different lives if I wanted to. But maybe that was all just an idea in my head and not reality. Now I realize the extent to which I might not actually believe in this quote at all...I now see that this quote is also a challenging one in the sense that there is more to the picture.  I am often drawn to the idea of "re-inventing" myself or finding new hobbies, new passions, new outlets for my curiosity and sense of self. But as much as people try new things or surround themselves with different people, some things always stay the same. There are good things about change and there are good things about kicking bad habits, and finding positive people to be around. In the end, sometimes the very thing that can make you self-destruct is perhaps yourself. Once we have gotten a good foundation to lean on and to learn from, much of life is in our own hands...and in our own grasp. The idea that life is ten percent what happens to you and ninety percent how you handle it...can be said. But the reality is...Everyone wants different things out of life, and the ideal picture of life for someone looks completely different from someone else's ideal dream. What one person thinks is the most horrible thing in the world, someone else might think of it in a completely different way.

Hindsight is 20/20...but would we be the people we are if we have not made the mistakes that got us where we are. Some mistakes are how we learn about ourselves and how we learn about the world around us. Those mistakes, misfortunes, and wrong turns are highly valuable in the end. A little bit of life experience can go a long way. Our society has come a long way from the old days where people were expected to go down a straight and narrow path without many choices along the way. Now there are many different career paths to choose if you want to work, many times to start a relationship with who you choose, and many different times to see your "life-plan" come together. And the good thing is, there is no deadline and there is no reason why your "dream" or "goals" cannot change over and over again. The funny thing is...while you think you are searching, improving, and reaching your destination...the whole time you are LIVING. Everything you do does not have to scream excitement and fireworks do not have to go off about every little thing. During the journey, things that give you comfort, happiness, and peace are all things worthwhile. When you can sit down and really be glad with who you are and what you are doing...and how you treat others...and think what you have given back...and what you have gained from your friendships, relationships, family...that is when you realize that you might not have anything to run from and you do not have anything that you have to prove. Relish the simple moments that bring about all the clarity in the world. When we look at the big picture, we realize that the little details that people worry about and fret over are not always that important. Life is beautiful. The more you learn about others, the more you appreciate people's differences. So instead of running from yourself and thinking you always have to keep things fresh or new, don't forget what is right in front of you. Bring in the new things, but don't forget to remember what has gotten you here and what will get you to an even brighter future. You have one life to live, so live it well.

Why Get Married?

With the divorce rate so high...people sometimes question getting married these days. I only have my own marriage as experience, but I value my marriage and honestly it is a lot of fun...like one long extended sleepover. Lol...it's important to love your spouse as not only your partner in life but also as your friend. It is just as important to love them as it is to really like them...their personality will be there with you day after day. Is that person someone you mesh well with, someone that brings out the best qualities in you and vice versa. I don't think anyone should judge someone else's marriage, all marriages work differently...and the only people that truly know how things are going are the ones in the marriage. I was thinking the other day...people often say their spouse is their best friend. I can agree with that...but I got to thinking about how many best friends people might have throughout their life. Does marriage help you stay together longer than a regular friendship would last? If you're not married, is it easier to just pack up your bowling bag and leave whenever you like? Maybe there's something about standing in front of people, saying your vows, and signing your marriage license. However, some couples stay together for years without getting married. I think it is always an individual choice, a choice for couples to make together when they're both ready. People can jump all in and get married on a whim in Vegas...or you can think about it for years. Healthy relationships can lead to healthy loving marriages. And unhealthy bad relationships could lead to bad marriages...that is no big secret. The truth is that any marriage is going to be what you make it. Like a plant, it needs nourishment to grow. And the outcome can be a beautiful life with one another, but first you eventually have to take the chance, and jump right in and give it all you've got...because love is a wonderful thing...whether you get married or not. Don't let the divorce rate statistics scare you...they're only numbers after all.